This section, believe it or not, is called “What you should know before you install a hearth of your own.”

You should know that you’re probably going to burn your house down.

Or, in this case, your apartment building - from the looks of this, it’s in a big-city apartment tower or townhouse. In which case they’re going to be quite surprised upstairs when you ask if you could run a hot pipe through thier living room.

This is what we all thought we’d have in the future - an Inflammo-Hamper for our paper jumpsuits.